stuff

Instead of writing on this blog, I just keep looking at other blogs and well it doesn’t sit well with me sometimes because I get jealous and envious. I wish I could have a blog that was a part of what I did for a living – like making things, clothes, paper goods, accessories etc. but I don’t and as much as I would like to – I really don’t know how I would be able to. I mean, I really don’t know how it is these parents are able to do so much – run a business, a blog, and keep up with the demands of life as a parent. I don’t mean big mommy blogs like dooce or something which brings in millions of dollars in advertising sales and what not – plus her books and speaking engagements and yada yada yada…after all the money coming in, I would imagine it would be very easy to be doing what she is doing and that it then becomes a matter of upkeep..but then again she also staff on hand. Staff?! People to delegate to on the runnings of your own personal blog…amazing. I want that. I mean, I know she got fired,(“dooced”) for writing about her life/work to begin with but my gosh look what it has done for her. Have you seen her home? Anywayszzzz…

For once I would like to see a blog where it shows just how disheveled life can be sometimes. That it isn’t always perfectly placed pillows on the couch and neat and tidy everywhere. No toys scattered about, no strange items in strange places – like a toothbrush above the microwave next to n onion in the kitchen. Life isn’t always clean floors and made beds and designer or knock off pieces – at least not for me and if it is for you – by gosh..well, lucky you. But maybe these blogs express the neat & tidy side of their life they would like people to see but behind closed doors and away from the eyes and scrutiny of the internet it’s a different sight/site. Well, I want to see THAT site. THAT place. The doodles on the walls that never quite come off, the pieces of wood blocks scattered on the floor that even though you know they are there you just can’t seem to NOT step on one and scream at the top of your lungs. The dishwasher still full of clean dishes and the counters full of dirty ones. Yes, I want to see it. I want to see THAT..and yes, for the only reason to have myself feel better about the mess I live in, thank you very much.

I haven’t put up any photos of our new place because it still looks as if we just moved in yesterday. Boxes are still lined up along the walls in the formal living/dining room. The guest bedroom is still acting as our storage space and our bedroom still has us looking for clothes in boxes. Jax’s room is the only thing that resembles a decent room and thankfully he actually uses it these days. The family room which is fine but not really decorated is pretty bleh. I’ve been meaning to dye the slip covers that came with the couch and I’d really like to mount the tv onto the wall and replace the ikea bookshelf with our credenza. Gardening is also on my list but that hasn’t happened, except for the planting of 2 trees – one for Jax (and his placenta) and one in memory of my mom.

Also, I've come to realize that my mom's death is affecting this second pregnancy..(oh yeah, I haven;t mentioned that yet on this blog, have I? Yep, I'm pregnant.) that I find myself not super joyous as I was with my first pregnancy that I kind of feel a little stiff? if that makes any sense. Anyway, I have more about that on my baby blog.